Saturday, May 25, 2013

Lisa Copeland: 8 Dating Turnoffs Men Over 50 Should Stop Doing

Here's a heads up for the post 50 single men out there... We ladies are so excited when you choose us as the "girl" you want to meet. Hours before our date with you, we are worrying whether you'll like us. Our bedroom floor is littered with clothes as we look for just the perfect outfit to impress you. We do our best to look good, hoping the two of us click. Then the date happens and sometimes we're bewildered by who we meet.

1. Gentlemen, please dress like you care about yourself. You don't have to wear a suit to impress us but it would be nice if you didn't wear your baggiest jeans and a stained shirt. You may be losing weight but there are a zillion discount stores out there that will gladly sell you a nice pair of jeans and a polo style shirt for less than $50. It's worth the investment if you want to get a second date with us.

2. Women are really turned off and have no interest in kissing your bad teeth or skimming their lips over visible skin tags on your neck. Aging takes its toll on all of us physically, but don't let that be an excuse for being sloppy. You may be the greatest guy on the planet with the most sensual lips but if your teeth are missing or your skin has developed tags, then I guarantee you're getting passed over for an issue that can be easily fixed with a quick visit to your doctor or dentist.

3. Please choose a picture that looks like you for your online dating profile. A friend recently had a date with a man who was 100 pounds heavier than his online picture revealed. She got to the restaurant and was unable to identify her date. She resorted to calling him, figuring the guy who picked his phone up was her date. Show us who you really are. Doing a bait and switch with your pictures, hoping we'll like you in person only makes us wonder what else you're hiding.

4. Please don't start our date by telling us gross stories like your dog has fleas, especially if we've hugged you. A client of mine actually had this happen. There's no way we want to expose ourselves to situations that might be contagious. If anything, we'll want to leave so we can go home and fumigate our clothes. Yuck!

5. If you ask us out for a first date, please pay. We're happy to share the bill with you at a later date but whoever does the asking should be the one pulling their wallet out. Please don't ask us out if you can't even afford a cup of coffee. Get your financial situation straightened out before dating.

6. We know if you like us, you want to impress us with all you do and have. You drone on and on about all the great things in your life, even showing us pictures of your house, your car, your landscaping and your dog. We want to get to know you, but a one-way monologue is boring. We were taught as little girls to make you feel good so we listen. Most of us are not sure where to interject without appearing rude. It would be so helpful if you asked us questions too. Dialogue is much more fun!

7. Men, as you've aged you've become far more passionate in your political views. Many a woman has been forced to listen to you pontificate about the world and how you feel it should be run. There's nothing wrong with sharing your views. Just don't lecture us for an hour and then expect us to go out with you again. After 10 minutes, you've totally turned us off.

8. Lastly, please don't stick your tongue down our throats at the end of a first date when you like us. A gentle kiss feels so much nicer. Women are far more into romantic love and a slow gentle kiss will make us want you more. The tongue thrust makes us think you're at best overly aggressive and at worst a creep.


Okay, over 50's men out there, this was tough on you. My next article will be the biggest things women do to turn you off. If fact, feel free to make suggestions for what I should include in the comments.

In the meantime, if you really want to impress a woman consider keeping these eight turnoffs out of your dating repertoire. You'll have far better luck finding the woman of your dreams when you do.

Find out more about Lisa Copeland at www.FindAQualityMan.com.

Earlier on Huff/Post50:

  • New Blood At The Party

    Sometimes it feels like the foundation of your social life is so strong that you no longer find the opportunity to meet new and exciting people. Throw a barbecue or party in which guests bring a friend that no one in the group knows. Alternatively, tag along with a friend the next time their office has a company picnic or function -- this is a great way to meet somebody who you know is responsible enough to hold down a career and who you can 'check out' with an acquainted friend before you agree to a date.

  • Break The Gender Divide

    There's no longer a stigma about a woman learning to golf or a man taking a Pilates class, though such activities are still gender lopsided enough one way or the other to open up the dating options for the minority sex. In time you'll be able to go to a local public course and complete someone else's foursome, or cap off an exercise class by going for coffee with some of your fellow students -- both of which will give you the opportunity to meet a host of new people (most likely of the opposite sex). Just make sure you're doing something you want to do -- it would be a shame to begin a relationship under false pretenses.

  • Volunteer

    Organizations such as "Habitat For Humanity" allow you to come into contact with people of all ages and from all walks of life, all of whom have strong, respectable values. And it's not just a great chance to meet a prospective date -- volunteering attracts interesting, good-natured people who themselves are excited to meet new faces and make friends.

  • Join A Club

    Book clubs are great places to meet well-read, like-minded adults -- you can usually find one by calling your local library. Similarly, wine clubs, outdoors clubs and gardening clubs are good options as well depending on your interests. Joining a club allows you to grow as an individual and sets up the opportunity for you to meet someone who shares a common interest.

  • Go Online

    Singles over 50 are flocking to the online dating world more than any other demographic. It would be a shame to let 20th century prejudices about online dating spoil the opportunities that could await you with a membership. The perception that dating sites attract eccentrics or shut-ins is a dying one, but if you need convincing, just see for yourself the array of adults turning to sites like "Match" and "eHarmony" to help them begin meaningful relationships with interesting people. Here are the top five most popular dating sites for Post50s.

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Follow Lisa Copeland on Twitter: www.twitter.com/Over50DateCoach

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Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-copeland/dating-over-50-8-dating-turnoffs-men_b_3314123.html

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